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Why Divorce Mediation is Worthwhile

A person cannot reasonably gloss over how difficult divorce is, and how it tests the fortitude and perseverance of both spouses to start new lives as single adults. The litigation process associated with divorce often makes this separation even harder because it forces each spouse to take an adversarial approach to presenting his or her side to the judge. Emotions are already high between divorcing spouses, and injecting the contentious nature of litigation into the mix makes negotiating a settlement or refraining from high-conflict legal action extremely challenging.

Courts are, of course, capable of issuing decisions related to a couple’s unresolved issues, but they have limited understanding of the whole picture, and the solutions offered are based on a standard set of protocols that do not account for the specific needs of each couple and their family. Judges are not disinterested in the outcome, but with limited knowledge and time, they must make the best decisions available under the circumstances. Sidestepping the need for court intervention, and the associated time and money this process entails, is the primary goal of mediation, an alternative resolution method divorcing couples can use. Mediation offers the benefit of a neutral facilitator to help keep meetings civil and productive, as well as the important benefit of control and flexibility over how issues are resolved. A discussion of divorce mediation in general, and how it is useful, even if ultimately unsuccessful in resolving a case, will follow below.

Divorce Mediation Overview

Each marriage is different, and the needs and priorities of spouses going through divorce will naturally differ, as well. While divorce law does allow for some flexibility in meting out solutions to issues like property division, parenting time, and alimony, it must be general enough to address a wide range of circumstances. Thus, when judges are assessing a case, they do so through a lens that is narrower than the one a couple would use to examine the same matters. This reality, plus overbooked court dockets, mean most family court judges require spouses in contested divorce cases to attend mediation before they will schedule a hearing to discuss the demands of each party. Consequently, anyone considering divorce in Indiana should understand mediation is a standard part of the process, but not one that should be glossed over in favor of a judge’s decision. In other words, each party should fully participate in mediation, which typically involves a neutral mediator, the spouses, and their attorneys.

The mediator may meet with each side separately or together to gauge the goals and desires of everyone, but will not tell the parties how to structure the terms of the agreement, or the legal implications of a particular arrangement – this role is handled by the attorneys. Instead, the mediator will help find points of compromise, and try to suggest possible avenues of agreement that would avoid the need for direct court oversight.

Why Mediation is Always Worthwhile

Litigation does have a place in the divorce process, but it should not be the go-to for most couples, absent abuse, addiction, or extremely high-conflict situations, as it often serves to further fracture relationships that may need to continue, particularly if children are involved. While mediation may not ultimately result in a partial or complete settlement, at the very least, it will allow each spouse to understand the position of the other side, and to be clear on what truly matters to him or her. This knowledge will benefit the court process, as it will help to focus efforts with the judge, and give him/her a better and more concise information to make a decision.

Get Legal Advice

Making hard decisions is an integral part of divorce, but understanding what these decisions mean long-term is harder without sound legal advice. Christopher L. Arrington, P.C. has years of experience helping clients work through the issues of divorce, and is available to discuss the best approach to your situation. Contact the Danville office to schedule an appointment.



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